Last night i decided to get off my ass and go to the gym.  Something i should’ve done months ago.

It was good, i tried to jog a whole mile non-stop, but ended up breaking it up with walking in between, but i only counted the laps i jogged, and i still managed to sprint a quarter lap in the end, which nearly killed me.  After nearly collapsing while catching my breath i carried on with the free weights.

Luckily i had been participating in the 100 Push Up Challenge before going to the gym, which allowed me to continue my chest presses exactly where i left off over 6 years ago!  I was quite excited about that!  Six year ago i was truly at my physical peak, if you can actually believe that.  I still haven’t been able to do 100 consecutive push ups and i’m not sure if i’m going to continue to train for it.  I want to go for power instead endurance right now, and so i don’t know if the 100 Push Ups Challenge is still right for me.

Last night as i was jogging i was channeling my anger and sadness into motivation to keep my legs going.  Eventually i got into a rhythm near the end, a rhythm that i hope to continue when i go back to the gym.  I still don’t know why i’m going to the gym either, i asked myself that a lot last night.  Am i going to the gym for myself, or going to the gym for her?  I somehow feel that i may be able to win her back if i get healthier and more fit.  Which in itself is somewhat ridiculous, why would she take me back if i looked different?  I am still the same person now as when she met me before.

Besides, this change thing isn’t just going to happen over night.  I really want to make the lifestyle change.  I am contemplating boxing up all the junk food in the house and giving it away.  But I love my chips and chocolate way too much.  Maybe i can keep it around if i don’t eat it all the time.

Moderation is key.

I always have to tell myself this –moderation.

Moderate what i eat, moderate my money, moderate my life.
Moderation is key.